Although the perfect method of raising children is yet to be discovered, the great idealists of the past have developed theories that may assist parents of this age and the future. Some have even compiled a list of stages that young children go though, which may assist parents in understanding what their child is going through. Autonomy vs. Shame & Doubt, which is the second stage in Erikson’s theory, occurs between the ages of 2-3 years old, during which, parents should create a supportive environment. In this stage, children learn self-control, self-confidence, empathy, and anxiety. Like Erik Erikson; Jean Piaget, Sigmund Freud, and Alfred Adler have their own theories and stages for raising children.
Children at this age are only beginning to learn how to control themselves and can progress much better with the guidance of their parents (guardian). Toddler do not judge what they do, they basically act on impulse. At this stage in development you’ll know when the child is learning more self-control when he/she becomes more cooperative. Toddlers learn through repetition, they need constant reiteration in order to completely grasp what you are trying to make them understand. Such as telling the child that he/she should not pull anyone’s hair, you can say it maybe five times and the child still does not listen but at the tenth time the child finally understands what you are trying to tell them. Sometimes a child can be told that he/she is doing something wrong and know that it is wrong but continue to do it. The child continues only because he/she does not know how to control it yet. Givie the toddler compliments or praising him/her for controlling any urge to do something. It encourages self-confidence, in knowing that they did something right instead of constantly hearing someone saying “no” for every wrong move they make.
Toddlers at the age of two begin to be more self-assured. For most they will be more comfortable with people other than their siblings or parents, such as grandparents, aunts and uncles. He/she still craves for attention but not as mush due the fact that they are learning to speak more and more words. This as a result, gives the child more control over the situation. Before they do learn how to speak the child reacts in frustration because he cannot get what he wants. As with anything else whatever the child does on her own you must praise her to aid with self-confidence.
At this age the child may begin to consider and realize that other people have feelings. But most likely he/she will still put themselves first. For example, a child may have to share a toy, pause to think about it, but still continue on playing with it.
Most people may not think that toddlers have anxiety, but they do. Like when the child’s uncle reaches out to hold him, he turns around and grasps his mom or dad. The child may also have a difficult time when his mother leaves the room for a couple minutes or even with loud or sudden noises. It is very normal for a child to have these types of anxieties. As the child matures the fears will fade.
Published in: Family