Parent Help: How to Deal with Teens

As a teenager I know firsthand what I am putting my parents through on a daily basis. The fact that their hair has not fallen completely out or turned gray is a miracle.  I figured what better way to help parents with teens or soon-to-be-teens, than to hear from a teen what ideas and tactics work.. These three tips are vital for maintaining control of your household when your child becomes a teen.

1. Patience. Patience is key when it comes to controlling a teen and dealing with their problems. Some teens are worse than others but every kid will go through a rough patch. A combination of the pressure from high school and the changing mind and body of the teen will be responsible for most of their issues. The key for a parent is to not blame their child for their actions but to patiently accept the fact that teenagers go a little crazy. Patience is needed to work with the teenager to show them the errors of their ways. It is never too late to discipline a teen and show them that their actions have consequences. Discipline isn’t the whole solution. Every incident or event that requires discipline should involve a lesson  to be learned about the consequences and what an alternative course of action would be in that situation. In this world the key to staying ahead is self-responsibility; use every opportunity you have to make sure you  get this message across. Stay patient and do not show anger. You can be tough with a teen but make sure it is productive with a message.
2. Self confidence. When your teen does something good no matter how little,  let him or herknow you are proud. It’s a good feeling and they will think that they are capable of achieving their goals. When a teen feels good about pleasing his parents he automatically will start showing more respect for all adults and he will think twice about how to handle new situations in a way that will make you proud. The point is to get into their heads and provoke them positively to think through their daily actions. Another way to boost self confidence is to help them find something that they are good at or they enjoy doing. No matter what your feelings are about the activity, you need to be there for them and support them with their hobbies. Positive and constructive uses of time are extremely important–many teens turn down dark roads due to lack of positive uses of their time and faulty parental supervision.
3. Give them attention. Many teens act out because they lack attention from home. Don’t make them ever feel like there is something wrong with them when the problem stems from you not being there for them. Make it clear that they can get your attention best by doing well, but that you will be paying attention if things go wrong as well. The only downside to this is you cannot do  too much for them because then they will either  do whatever it takes for more and more or they will close themselves off because they want privacy. Every teen is different, and as a parent you need to find a proper balance on how much oversight to give them and for what.

It is important to remember that it is your job to teach your children how to make the right choices to give them the best options in life. You are their strongest life line on how to navigate the world safely. Parents fail when they punish or ignore their teens instead of teaching. Keep in the back of your mind that it is never too late to get a message across, act calm and take control of the situation.