Imparting the best moral values in children is very important to help them grow into a responsible citizen. Some parents are not really keen at it from the beginning and as a result suffer a lot in later stages. Here are some of the basic points you need to bear in mind while imparting moral values among growing children.
Children cannot usually be hurried upon the developmental journey. There are stages on developmental track for both social and moral development. You need to concentrate on areas in your efforts while imparting him moral education. You need to understand their progress the variable pace with which they are grasping the values you are trying to inculcate among them.
Different cognitive researches show that children most of the times may nod affirmative and seem to understand, but actually it may be unlikely that they understood the actual point you are try to make to them. That is the reason that trying to impart moral education in such abstract method by discussions etc is not very effective on children. A better approach to this is by working on actions involving reciprocity. By making them understand like “if you pinch me I will pinch you” they start seeing morality as pragmatic. This paves way for later stages where in formal reasoning develops in them and they tend to become more receptive for such abstract appeals.
Children need reassurances in the earlier stages of struggle between trust and mistrust or shame and guilt. Constant put-downs and hammered moralizing develops inferiority among them. Instead of constant correction a different approach of acceptance should be adopted to raise make them autonomous. Some children may get struck on an early developmental stage if that stage is not navigated successfully.
We need to understand that children do not see the world in philosophical categories of moral or immoral. They at this stage understand only reward and punishment. Good things bring reward and bad things cause punishment. This is probably among the earliest orientations they learn. In later stages of childhood they start liking things to be fair and law-driven. They develop sense of following rules, they understand breaking the rule mean punishment and following the rule mean reward. It is the adolescence that they understand seeing things on moral grounds. So you need to be patient and keep imparting and inculcating your moral values in them smartly. Do not expect them to understand morals very early instead work with them and nurture their understandings.
Published in: Family