If you have children who are wayward and who need guidance, see that they get it. A child’s mind must be taught to react in the proper manner, else how will it function properly? Remember thinking creates a mental pattern. If you study physiological psychology, you will find many more reasons for creating the correct mental reactions in your child. Never tell a child he is stupid, mean, ignorant, crazy, sick, or any other such thing. Such remarks are suggestive, and have a tendency to create such an ideation in the child’s mind.
I do not mean that you should not reprimand a child. That may be necessary. Always speak encouragement and heartening words to a child. If the child is stupid, tell him he can be as smart as anyone if he will only apply himself, but never tell him he is stupid.
Show him how to apply himself. If he is mean, tell him that he should not do the things he does and tell him why, as well as how to do different. Tell him the disadvantages of doing wrong. Tell him the great advantage of doing the right things. Impress on him how detrimental it is to him to do the wrong things. This will build up in his mind certain inhibitions against those things he should not do.
Many of us carry with us the very thing which makes for our defeat. We carry it without knowing it. What is it? It is a negative attitude. If you think you will not win; if you doubt your ability to succeed, you have odds against you. If you think failure, you are doomed to failure. If you think you are sick, you will get sick. If you fear some malady, it will have a tendency to afflict you. That is not exactly a correct statement but it conveys my meaning to the general public.
Your mental attitude is reflected in your general conduct, in your efforts, in your speech, in your very eyes. As a simple illustration everyone can understand – a dog knows when a man is afraid of it and will charge it for a bite; whereas, if the man is unafraid, it will stand clear of him. Animals recognize fear if it is present in a human being. Help your child by implanting in him ideas of fearlessness.
To those of you who do not know anything about psychology, the next statement may seem silly. You can talk to the subconscious mind of your child during the first hour of sleep, if you sit or stand beside his bed and talk gently to him after he falls asleep. Say to him, “Do not awaken. Sleep soundly.” Say this a few times and continue with whatever you wish to impress on him.
You might say, “Listen to me, son. Do not awaken. Just listen to what your mother has to say. You will wish to get up at seven tomorrow and you will wish to go to school. You will like to go to school every day, etc.” Repeat it several times in a gentle voice just loud enough so that he could hear you if he were awake.
Do this night after night. You will be surprised at the effect it will have on your child’s conduct. If the child should happen to wake up while you are talking, just say, “Why aren’t you asleep?” or some other remark to conceal the fact that you were addressing him in his sleep. This scientific procedure has been proven correct and powerful in shaping a child’s conduct. Several scientists who have experimented with child psychology have tested the procedure.
Such a procedure will produce powerful positive results in your child’s life.
Published in: Family