Funny Things Kids Say

     Kids are wonderful.  They will usually say exactly what they are thinking; unlike adults, they don’t worry about what people will think of them, who their audience is, or if what they say is politically correct.  My children are no exception.  Please enjoy this collection of brief moments of child-induced hilarity in my life!

     My three-year-old daughter Madeleine had not been sleeping through the night.  She had continually complained of seeing monsters in her bedroom.  I finally sat her down for a heart-to-heart talk.  I explained that sometimes shadows can look like monsters.  I told her that there were no such things as monsters and even if there were, mommy and daddy would never let them into our home, let alone her bedroom.  She looked unconvinced, so I launched into a full-blown pep talk.  I told her that she was a strong and brave girl.  She could face her fears and conquer them!  After emphasizing how brave she was for the millionth time and telling her over and over again that if she ran into anything resembling a monster that SHE could scare IT away, it looked like I was getting through.  I had given my daughter the courage to face her fears! 

     I was feeling pretty proud of myself when I asked her, “So, what do you do if you think you see a monster in your room?”

     She boldly replied, “RUN!”

     Another ”Madeleine” moment came when  we were traveling.  We had been discussing the delicate topic of death a few days before our trip.  Our fifteen-year-old dog had just passed away and Madeleine and I had had several discussions about Heaven.  She knew that Heaven was where we go when we die and that it was located somewhere up in the sky.   We had been traveling for a few hours when inevitably someone had to go to the bathroom.  We pulled the car into a rest area that was located at the top of a hill.  The walk to the building where the restrooms were located consisted of climbing up what must have seemed like a million stairs to a three-year-old! 

     When we finally reached the top, Madeleine asked, “Is this Heaven?”

     Not to be outdone by her little sister, my five-year-old daughter Laurel has provided us with some funny moments also!  One time, my husband and I were in our hallway discussing a home improvement show that he was watching on T.V.  The topic was laminate wood flooring.  Laurel, who (as usual) had been listening intently to every word of our conversation, ran quickly into the room where the T.V. was located.  She was in there for a few minutes and then rejoined us out in the hall. 

     ”Where’s the lamb?” she asked with a confused look on her face.

     “What lamb?” we asked with equally confused looks on our faces.

     ”The lamb in the floor!  Daddy said there were ’Lamb-in-it’ floors on T.V.”

     Hope you’ve enjoyed these brief moments of child-induced comedy from my life!  The world would definately be a more boring place if it weren’t for our little ones!!