Dad and Divorce: Custodial and Financial Strains

Divorce is not easy, through the eyes of the father, having to sit back and take what the judge doles out in the final court hearing. As a dad of three, living now in his home state in order to pay the bills and take charge of his responsibilities still as a father is not easy. But he does it every single day, without an issue.

My husband now of one year has recently gone through a nasty battle with his ex wife. Through it all, we stayed strong, not only for ourselves, but for his children. There are so many strains and pains he has to overcome in order to keep on living after his divorce. If it were not for our religious beliefs and family, we would not be where we are today, now stronger than ever.

When divorce rears its ugly head, after the paperwork and the lawyers have come to certain terms, it is time to move forward with everything. For my husband, there were three children in the mix, so it made it all the more painful for him to have to leave where they were in order to continue making a living so that he could keep providing for them. As the truly amazing father that he is, he made sure that he had a steady income to care for them, as well as to make sure that they had a roof over their heads. It is not easy to move forward when you know you have a certain amount coming out of each paycheck for child support every month, but we have done it.

When my husband finally decided that it was best for his children to stay with their mother, rather than move them across country to an unfamiliar area, terms were agreed upon between the two exes. It took a lot of money to pay for a lawyer and a year and a half to come to agreeable terms to end the marriage. The court is usually in favor of the mother having the children unless they find any reason why she may not be able to provide for them, including adequate food, clothing, and shelter.

The heartache my husband has to go through is enough to break anyone’s heart who is willing to understand. He has to deal with the grief every single day of having to leave his children behind in order to provide for them constantly from a distance. With his ex being in contempt of the court order of allowing him to speak to his children, it has been nothing but a nightmare we would just like to wake up from.

The one thing that I would completely like to change about divorce with children is the communication factor. When the party with the children do not allow a conversation, something should be able to be done immediately. Especially if the support for the children is being paid and the father wishes with his whole heart that he could speak to his little ones.