Controlling Mothers
Some mothers can’t function without controlling their children. They may run guilt trips on their sons or daughters so that they get exactly what they want and it’s so sad that they do this.
Mothers who control their sons or daughters are doing severe damage to them. They are setting their children up for mental disorders and aggressive behaviors. Some mothers can’t accept that their children want to do their own things. They won’t allow their children to have some breathing room. If their son (s) tells them that they have found someone they really like than trouble could be lurking. The mother may feel abandoned because to move their child or children have decided to move forward. They may have a hard time accepting this.
They refuse to accept that their son or daughter space and wants to live his or her own life. They may want to call them all the time or interfere with their new found relationship. The mother (s) may not see their son or daughter as an adult and feel that they know what’s best for them. If they were controlling from the time they were children than it is likely that they would continue such behavior. Some of the controlling mothers have never married and experience loneliness when their children are gone. They are more controlling when they have only one child. It maybe difficult for the son or daughter to stand up to their controlling mother.
Their son or daughter must stand their ground if they want to hold on to their relationships. They will never have friends or experience joy if they allow the mother to invade in the their private lives. If the son or daughter stays quiet than their relationship will suffer. They must let their mother know that they are not willing to accept their controlling behavior. Some may not get the picture at first but eventually they will.
If the son or daughter keeps quiet than the mother will continue the unhealthy behavior and that could be tragic. Control is a form of abuse and if it is deep control than the children could be identified as having a mental disorder. Mother’s who control their children have deep issues that they never dealt with. They may have been exposed to abandonment or abuse as a child. It is unacceptable for their behavior and they must be told about it. They may ruin many lives because of their control and the damage may not be reversible.
Picture courtesy of my1stsuit.wordpress.com
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Published in: Family
Jswana | Sep 19, 2012 | Reply
I don’t like controlling people of any kind, particularly mothers. I believe Usher’s mother is/was. But you’re right, people have to find their way. Protect children when they are young and trust that your teachings will allow them to make good decisions. wonderful share and thanks!
nourisv | Sep 19, 2012 | Reply
yes…A child sometimes should step out of her or his parent’s shadow to be fully nourished.
Eunike | Sep 19, 2012 | Reply
Thanks for sharing
Rose that grew from concrete | Sep 19, 2012 | Reply
I know someone like this. You have to learn to let go, for your children to grow. Thanks for sharing
Tanushree Saha | Sep 19, 2012 | Reply
I liked it, thanks for sharing!
Uzoma | Sep 19, 2012 | Reply
I have learnt here. Thanks Tiki33
Robin L | Sep 19, 2012 | Reply
My mother was a very controlling woman, even when I became an adult…Very well written article…..
joey111 | Sep 19, 2012 | Reply
Nice article!
Nxwtypx | Sep 19, 2012 | Reply
My mom’s a tiny bit overbearing, but everything turned out okay over here.
gaby7 | Sep 19, 2012 | Reply
I agree that children need their space, but continous guidance with occasional repremand is not entirely bad!
Lynn Hollis | Sep 19, 2012 | Reply
A tough situation to deal with. My mother raised twelve children, so she was quite ready to let go when we became adults.
Brenda Nelson | Sep 20, 2012 | Reply
Mothers who let the kids make all the decisions (also know as Jellyfish parents are just as bad, if not worse. Kids who never learn how to accept NO as an answer are going to have tough times as adults too. But for sure kids who are treated too harsh will also struggle. It has to be a balance.
BC Doan | Sep 21, 2012 | Reply
It’s good to understand why some mothers are like that, but they can change, and we have hopes