Sharing Space and Being a Roommate

Whether it is one or many, having to share space with other people, even if you came from a large family, is always problematic. Few people enter the ‘contract’ as if it is a contract and ‘rules’ are rarely announced before they are broken.  This short essay should give you a bit of a head’s up.  It doesn’t deal with every single possible situation, just the most common.

1. If you didn’t buy it, don’t use it

This rule has it’s obverse; If You Use It, Buy it Back.

In almost every situation there is the ‘Duchess’ who buys Blue Mountain Coffee, Haagen Das Ice Cream, and Salmon, and the “Skivy” who buys the cheapest instant coffee blend, the product which can’t put the word Cream on it’s lable, and something in a tin which resembles a fishkind.

There wouldn’t be a problem if the Skivvy ate what she bought, but you know she’ll be drinking six cups of Blue Mountain a day, leaving less than half of the container of ice cream, and snacking on the salmon.  When asked to replace it she, (all together now)buys the cheapest instant coffee blend, the product which can’t put the word Cream on it’s lable, and something in a tin which resembles a fishkind.

You know someone is moving out.

2. Respect

Give the other person the rights to their own property, their own space.  If the other(s) are sleeping do not blast the T.V. or radio, if they are eating, don’t be combing your hair at the table, if they are talking on the phone, shut up.  The word ‘circumspect’ should be tatooed on your eyelashes.  You are not living alone. Another person or persons are being effected by you.  You do not own the world. They have rights too.  Don’t be the one who has to be asked to turn down the television. Don’t be the one who uses off the last toilet roll and doesn’t replace it.  If the other person is the one, move out.  Don’t argue.  If you’ve asked them once not to blast the radio when you’re sleeping, that is all the asking you are to do. 

3. Synthesis

You are not ‘in Kansas’ anymore. Whatever religion, culture, traditions you practiced at home, might have to be somewhat altered now that you are not home anymore.  Don’t expect everyone to conform to you, nor do you need to conform to them.  There has to be a kind of multi-cultural basis in the premises.  If you are so tied to your religion or culture or traditions, either find those just like you, or be prepared to practice in your bedroom, with the door closed.

Most people know how to blend. They know how to respect each other and give each other space.  If you find yourself in a situation where you are either being squeezed into a corner or feel forced to participate in what you don’t agree with, move out.

4. Options

From the day you move in, always examine options of moving out. Always have open doors in other places. Never put yourself into an intolerable situation you can’t leave. 

If you can follow these four tips, you’ll make a good roommate.